I didn’t get rid of my Blazer yesterday, I got rid of it the day before.  My means of mechanized conveyance.  My sway backed nag mare of a vehicle.  My rattletrap.  My “big old rolling turd” is now gone.  At first I was disappointed that I forgot to relate a major point in my day in the method I have chosen.  I remembered so much about sharing and finding the vegetables, the blazer moving on simply got shoved out of my mind.  Then I realized, the very fact that I forgot it in my mind, to make room for talking about vegetables and goat beds says something.  I suspect its a lesson I have learned as I finally become an adult, and I am not so sure that everyone learns it.

A car is not who you are.  It is a means of getting from point A to point B to allow you to do the things in your life that are actually important.  It might actually say something about you, but probably not what you want it to say.  While a car is important as a survival tool, it should in no way define who you are as a person.

How many of us feel that “If I only had X car, then everything would be so much better”.  If I had that car, I could get the girl.  I could get the job.  Life would be better.  We go out and wreck our lives with car payments, just for something flashy.  We will eat ramen, and live in a cracker-box apartment, just so we can impress strangers at a stop light.  My wife and I signed ourselves up for a financial death spiral because I got car fever.  I mean, isn’t it entirely logical in America for two people making a combined $32000 a year to have $650 in car payments in a month.  Its a great addition to that $1000 mortgage.

I just had to have that sporty car.  I knew that if I could only drive that around, it would say that I made it.  Owning that car, I would never have to worry.  That would be the chariot that rode me off into the future I wanted to live.  It was totally worth dragging our finances out into the alley and shooting them.  I felt like such a big man driving that thing around.  I could watch the debt wracking up and feel it was just a thing that happens to all of us.

Then we moved to Arizona, and I learned what it actually was to be a man.  I sold that car to release the debt load on my family.  I got a $2000 brown 1998 blazer.  I drove that car for almost two years.  At first I missed my Mazda.  Then I realized that I was the same person inside that ugly brown rattle cage as I was inside my sports car.  Driving that blazer allowed us to pay off close to $40,000 of our debt.  At the end, it allowed my wife to quit the work force and be the stay at home wife she always wanted.  The blazer finished his role as an active vehicle, and became the elder statesman at the junkyard.  Now we share one car, and I forgot that I even got rid of him.  I have learned true priorities.

We all have something in life that we assign value where it doesn’t belong.  In many of our cases, its a car, but it doesn’t have to be.  You will still be you, for all your strengths and flaws, no matter what trappings you assign yourself.  Inside you, is an adult, a paradigm, a paladin, simply waiting for you to find them.  You will probably have an easier time finding them, without so many empty layers of trash on top.

Paleo Portion:

I feel like I didn’t even eat yesterday, so I don’t have much to share.

Breakfast:

Two cups of coffee, cream and cane sugar.

Lunch:

We tried to order some wings that I could eat, since my co-worker and I were stuck at work and couldn’t leave.  We learned that no one delivers to us.  So he got food I couldn’t eat.  Oh well.

Dinner:

Egg Drop soup

Organic Watermelon

Jenn made some tasty, tasty egg drop soup.  Homemade of course.  Very good.  Also had my first organic watermelon ever.  It was awesome.  The rind on an organic watermelon is much thinner than a regular one.  It was also so much sweeter.  Yay, organic charities.

Weight: 236

Somehow despite not eating, I still gained.  I blame the one freaking cookie I ate the other day.

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